How to Bet On Yourself (Even When You're Scared to Lose)
“I don't like to gamble. But if there is one thing I’m willing to bet on, it is myself.”
That line has been sitting with me since I first heard Beyoncé say it, and it became the entire foundation for this month on She's So Lucky. May is officially our Betting on Yourself series, and I’m kicking it off with a solo episode to tell you more about the inspiration behind the series.
This solo episode was inspired by the one-year anniversary of the She's So Lucky rebrand — something I almost let slide by without acknowledgment because April came and went and I was too busy recovering from what felt like every illness known to humankind. But as I started reflecting on the year, I kept coming back to the original vision for this show. The mood board Lola from The Brand Doula and I built when we were creating the brand identity. The cards, the dice, the clovers. The whole vibe of She's So Lucky was always about one thing: betting on yourself and increasing the odds of your luck.
So let's talk about what that actually looks like.
Step One: Play the Hand You're Dealt
Earlier this year, I had a conversation with Netflix star and real estate entrepreneur Tricia Lee that unlocked something in my brain. She said “you can become consumed with the hand you're dealt. But girl, if you're at the table, you better play, and you better play to win.”
And I haven’t stopped thinking about it since.
So many of us are spending enormous amounts of energy staring at our hands. Cataloging what we don't have. Comparing our hand to the person next to us. Getting distracted by what's not fair and what we didn't get and who got more. And look there’s a lot of validity in that. All kinds of hands get dealt at this table, and some of them are genuinely harder than others. I'm not here to pretend otherwise.
But here's what I know: the energy you spend focused on what you don't have is energy you are actively pulling away from playing what you do have. And when you fold before you even make a move? You're guaranteeing the loss. You don't know what could be on the other side of that play. You have to put something down.
For me personally, I had to reckon with the fact that I'd been playing the wrong hand entirely. I'd been showing up in an influencer lane knowing full well that's not where I wanted to be. And then I was confused about why I wasn't getting the opportunities I wanted. That's like preparing to win a basketball game and putting yourself on a football field. It doesn't matter how good you are — you're playing the wrong game.
Betting on yourself starts with being honest about what game you're actually trying to win.
Step Two: Roll the Dice, But Come Prepared
Every woman you admire has taken a risk. Every single one. There is not one uber-successful, incredible person you look up to who has not put herself out there to do something people didn't understand, jumped before she was fully ready, or tried something that made the people around her nervous.
Betting on yourself requires being willing to roll the dice. But — and this is the part that gets left out of the inspirational quote — rolling the dice does not mean being reckless. It means being prepared.
When I think about the luckiest version of myself — the one who has the things I'm working toward — what is she really good at? What does she have in place? Because there is nothing worse than getting a great opportunity and not being ready to receive it. The preparation is what turns a role of the dice into a real shot.
So part of placing bigger bets on yourself is placing the smaller ones first. It's the daily reps. It's the skill-building you do before anyone is watching. It's staying ready so you don't have to get ready. Because here's what I know about luck: you can't control timing, but you can control placement. You can put yourself in the right position. And the more in position you are, the more those odds start shifting in your favor.
Also, other people's inability to understand your vision is not a reason to stop moving. If something has been placed on your heart to do, that vision is yours. It's not always meant for everyone else to grasp before you execute it. The people who are comfortable with you staying exactly where you are will never be the ones who push you toward where you're going. Take the feedback that comes from people who understand where you're headed. Everything else? Noted and released.
Step Three: Bet On the Four-Leaf Version of Yourself
Okay, this is the one I'm most proud of, and honestly it's the piece of this episode I've been building toward for a long time.
You know why a four-leaf clover is lucky? Because it's rare. It's a variant. It's unlike what's growing all around it.
When I think about a three-leaf version of ourselves, I think about chasing trends. Fitting into boxes that were built by someone else. Doing something because we see other people getting results with it and we want those same results. The three-leaf version is always looking sideways at what everyone else is doing.
The four-leaf version? She's so locked into her own unique essence that she doesn't have time to look sideways. She's building something that only she can build. She's placing bets on what makes her genuinely different — her specific gifts, her specific vision, her specific voice. And that's hard. It’s so much easier to hop on what's trending. It's easier to give people what's already working. But when you win from being fully yourself — when a piece of content lands because it's a genuinely unique thought that could only come from you, when an opportunity comes because of the thing that's actually yours — that feeling is different. It's a different kind of satisfaction.
I know for me, some of the moments where I've gotten the most engagement have been from content that felt cheap to me. Something slightly inflammatory, something trend-chasing, something that got the algorithm's attention but didn't actually feel like me. And when I tell you I usually take that content down — not because it performed badly, but because it felt icky — that's the three-leaf version getting some shine she doesn't deserve.
I would rather resonate deeply with fewer people who actually see me than get mass traction for a version of myself I'm not trying to be.
So as you think about the bets you're making on yourself, make sure you're betting on your four-leaf version. Make sure you're building toward something that will feel good not just when you get it, but throughout the whole process of getting there. Because if you build a house on a three-leaf foundation, you're going to hate being in it. I promise you that.
Step Four: Lucky Girls Don't Fold, They Stay In the Game
Betting on yourself is not a one-time decision. It's an everyday decision. And staying in the game when things aren’t working yet — when the bets aren't paying out, when the progress feels invisible, when people around you don't understand what you're doing — that’s where everything actually gets decided.
One thing I want you to hold onto: a bad round is not a bad life. If you bet on yourself and something doesn't work out the way you planned, that is one hand. That is one round. It is not an indictment of whether you are worth betting on. Take what you learned and bring it to the next play.
Some of the most important moments in staying in the game are also the most unglamorous ones. It's the Monday night when you're up late finishing the work because something is dropping Tuesday. It's the workout you do when nobody's watching. It's keeping the commitments you made to yourself even when there's no external accountability. Those moments are where the real leverage gets built. And if you're finding yourself unwilling to show up for those moments, it's worth asking yourself: am I actually working toward something I want? Or am I stuck in three-leaf energy, chasing something that looks good but doesn't actually fit?
Lucky girls don't fold. They plan their next play.
Three Affirmations to Keep You In The Game
When you feel like folding, come back to these:
The bet I placed on myself will pay off. I just have to stay in the game long enough to collect.
I don't fold when things get hard. I plan my next play.
Luck is not a lottery. It is leverage, and I build it every time I show up.
Your Homework For This Month
It's May, and all month long we are talking about betting on yourself. So here's what I want you to do: think of one bet you're willing to make on yourself this month. One risk. One step toward the thing you actually want.
And then go to@shesssoluckypod on Instagram and tell me what that bet is. Because the entire Clover community is rooting for you, and sometimes you just need someone to witness the bet out loud.
The full episode is live now wherever you get your podcasts. And stay tuned because all month long, we're going to hear from some incredible women who are masters at betting on themselves and have a lot of gems to share.
To recap what we're doing this month:
Playing the hand we have. No complaining, no comparing, no waiting for a better one.
Rolling the dice. Taking calculated risks and getting ourselves in position to win.
Betting on our four-leaf version. That rare, specific, authentic version of us that no one else can be.
Not folding. The game is long, and the longer we stay in it, the more leverage we build.
See you at the table.
She's So Lucky is a podcast for ambitious women who are ready to create their own luck. New episodes drop every Tuesday. Subscribe on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and YouTube.
